Yachiru and Periods
by arrancar125
Summary: just some of the things that would or could happen if Yachiru is on her period.
1. Chapter 1

**This fanfic is for my fans that wanted to more of Yachiru on her period and how crazy she can be when hormone enraged. **

Yachiru sat at her desk of the eleventh division's office eating a bag of candy. She was swinging her legs back and forth in her when suddenly, a leg of her chair snapped and she fell backwards.

Ikkaku and Yumichika walked in right as she was falling backwards, legs flailing over her head.

Both Yumichika and Ikkaku laughed hysterically.

"Maybe she should lay off the candy", Ikkaku whispered into Yumi's ear.

"Fat chance of that happening", he whispered back to Ikkaku.

Then they both broke out in laugher again until they felt a certain pink haired shinigami reiatsu rise exponentially.

"Something funny Baldy, Feather Brow?" she peered at the two no longer laughing but now frightened shinigami.

"No Yachiru-fukutaicho!" they both saluted in unison.

"Really? I seem to have heard you say that I should 'lay off the candy'" she air-quoted Ikkaku. Then she turned to Yumichika and said, "And you, you said '_**fat**_ chance of that happening'" she spat out.

"Well . . . what we meant . . . we didn't mean that . . ." they both stuttered but before they could explain, Yachiru had her hand on her zanpakuto and was now unsheathing it.

"Any last words before I kill you?" she peered at them giving them her deadliest death stare.

"Just one", Yumi began.

"Run!" Ikkaku shouted then the two shinigami took off with a very unhappy and rather angered fukutaicho chasing them.

"Come back here and die like men you pansies!" she screamed after them.

Ikkaku and Yumichika ran for their lives around the entire eleventh division but no matter where they ran, Yachiru was always right behind them.

"Ikkaku, Yumichika, what the hell is going on?" captain of the eleventh division asked them.

"Yachiru's trying to kill us and we don't know why" Ikkaku explained.

"Well, it's because you called her fat you Neanderthal", Yumi slapped Ikkaku on the back of his head.

"Me! You're the one who said 'fat change of that happening'" Ikkaku whined.

"Wait, you called Yachiru fat?" he chimed in.

"Well, not exactly", they both looked away from their captain.

"So what exactly did you say?" he peered at the two trembling shingami.

"Well, I said Yachiru should lay off the candy" Ikkaku began.

"While I said 'fat change of that happening'" Yumi finished.

"And why would you two say something like that in the first place?" Kenpachi grabbed them both by the collar pulling them both off the ground.

"Well, sir", Ikkaku said, "Ya see, Yachiru was eating some candy and then—"

"She fell bank in her chair and broke it", Yumi cut in. "That's when we told her she should . . ."

"I got it", Kenpachi said dropping the two on the ground. "So, do you think I should let Yachiru kill you and that _**I**_ should kill you?"

"Uh . . . neither Zaraki-taicho sir", Ikkaku squeaked.

"Yeah, what he said", Yumi agreed.

"Nope, I have a better idea", he grinned then grabbed the two shinigami by the collar again and dragged them to the training grounds.

"Taicho, what are you going to . . ."

"Oh you'll see", he smiled back at them.

Once at the training grounds, Kenpachi tied the two numbskulls to a tree then stuffed candy down their uniforms.

"Okay Yachiru, whenever your ready", he hollered behind him.

When the two tied up shinigami looked up, they saw a bat in her hands and a blindfold over her eyes.

"Taicho . . ." they both gulped.

"Okay Yachiru, let'em have it", Kenpachi laughed.

Yachiru pulled back the bat and swung as hard as she could but she missed.

"Ikkaku, Yumichika, if you don't let her hit you, then I'll have to kill you", Kenpachi shouted to the two shinigami.

Ikkaku and Yumi just sighed and let Yachiru have at them.

Yachiru took her bat and swung at Ikkaku first and knocked half his candy out but she didn't stop there. She then took her bat and swung at Yumichika.

Yumichika was about to scream until Kenpachi gave him a death glare and Yumi decided to whole it back.

Yachiru swung at both of them and knocked all their candy out but continued to hit them repeatedly.

She swung and swung, each time hitting them harder and harder.

"Taicho . . . make her stop", they whined.

Kenpachi did enjoy seeing the snot beat out of them but he figured he should stop this before Yachiru killed his best men.

"Yachiru, stop", he called to her but she continued.

Yachiru swung one more time at both their heads then grabbed all her candy and skipped over to Kenpachi.

"Look Ken-chan, look at all the candy I got", she squealed at him jumping up and down.

Kenpachi just laughed. He was just happy Yachiru was happy again and that she hadn't killed his best men.

"That's great Yachiru, I'm glad" he smiled. Then he picked up Yachiru, placed her on his shoulder and walked away.

"Oh and Ikkaku, Yumichika . . ." he called over his shoulder.

"Yes taicho?" they replied in unison.

"When you get yourselves down, be sure to come by and clean Yachiru's room for me, thanks."

Ikkaku and Yumichika sighed and just tried to untie themselves.

"Well, let's get going", Ikkaku sighed when he got loose.

"Yeah, I suppose so", Yumichika sighed too joining Ikkaku on the ground.

Later that evening, Kenpachi went to go check on Ikkaku's and Yumichika's process on Yachiru's room.

When he opened the door, he saw all her furniture had been made with candy and everything that wasn't made out of candy was painted pink. Kenpachi clenched his fists as frustration hit him and he left to kill the two shinigami that candied Yachiru's room.

"Ikkaku! Yumichika! Where are you?!" he bellowed.

"I guess Zaraki-taicho hated the makeover" Yumichika stated.

"Guess not", Ikkaku agreed.

Then they sighed preparing for the chase.

**I hope you all liked that. I have more to come but it will be a while before updating. Please rview.**


	2. Chapter 2

Yachiru hated museums and today, she was especially unhappy to have to be walking around a lousy museum.

"Uno-chan, why are we here?" Yachiru whined. "I'm hungry".

"The tour isn't over yet. I promise we'll eat when it's done", she smiled down at the crabby pre-teen.

"Fine. Whatever" the pink haired shinigami huffed and puffed.

About an hour later, the tour hadn't ended and didn't look like it was going to.

"Uno-chan, I'm going to get something to eat, I'll be right back", she tugged on the healer's sleeve but she didn't seem to notice. So Yachiru just decided to walk off on her own.

She walked around looking for a way out of the boring museum, but couldn't find the exit. So, she decided to make one.

She pulled out her zanpakuto and slashed a big, gaping whole in the wall on hopped out.

She walked around trying to figure out where she was until she smelled grilled squid fill the air.

"Food", she squealed then ran light the speed of light to find where the smell was coming.

She ran for a good five minutes until she stumbled unto a moving cart.

"Hey! Watch where you're— oh, Kusajishi-fukutaicho, I didn't see you there. Can I help you?" the tall bearded man asked her.

She looked at the cart and noticed that it smelled just as good as the grilled squid but wasn't grilled squid. Nonetheless, she wanted whatever it was.

"What are ya selling?" she chirped.

"Shiskabobs. You want one?", he grabbed one and held it out to her.

"Yeah!" she grabbed the shiskabobs and ate the whole thing in one foul swoop, trying the stick to the ground when she was done. "Another", she jumped up and down.

"Sorry fukutaicho, first one's free, but the rest you gotta pay", he said.

She pulled out her purse and dumped all her money out onto the cart and said, "Give me all of them".

"Yeah, sure", he said wrapping all the shiskabobs he had into little to go boxes. "Now don't eat all of those at once or you'll turn into a fat pig by morning", he chuckled shoving off.

She hopped onto his cart and peered at him, "Do you think I'm a fat pig for wanting to eat all these?"

"No Kusajishi-fukutaicho. I just thought that—"

"So I'm a fat pig huh?" she turned over his cart. "Am I?!"

"No!" he hollered. "Please Kusajishi-fukutaicho, don't . . ." but she had already pulled out her zanpakuto and was now coming the cart pusher.

She slashed her zanpakuto at him knocking him down to the ground and knocking him unconscious.

She took the vender by his feet and dragged him to a pole not to far away. Then she harassed a woman for a piece of paper and a little boy for his crayon. Then she wrote, in blue crayola, on the piece of paper, '$5 to throw a dagger at the mean 'fat-calling women' man'.

She then threw him up in the air and struck her zanpakuto through his apron as he fell, pinned to the pole.

An hour later, she had over two hundred dollars and a horde of woman trying to kill the bearded man that implied she was fat.

"That will teach you to call me a fat pig", she laughed as another woman threw a dagger at the man.

"That will teach you to call women fat", one woman shouted.

"You're not so thin yourself", another woman shouted.

"Yachiru", Unohana tapped the young girl on the shoulder confused.

"Oh! Uno-chan", she squealed jumping up and down. "Look, look what I did".

Unohana saw a man pinned to a pole by what looked to be Yachiru's zanpakuto and a sign the read '$5 to throw a dagger at the mean 'fat-calling woman' man'.

"Yachiru, did this man call you fat?" she asked.

"More like a fat pig" Yachiru answered her.

"Well, in that case . . ." Unohana smiled, handed Yachiru a twenty. "I would like four tries, please".

Yachiru ran to the bag of daggers she had bought at the magic store and hand Unohana four.

"Watch and learn", she smiled at the pink haired shinigami.

Unohana placed all four daggers in one hand by their tips, turned around, and launched all four in the air.

"Hey, wait!" the bearded (stupid) man cried as one dagger pinned his sleeve, two hit his butt, and one came near his crouch.

"I think that's enough torture for one day Yachiru. Let's take the poor man down", she smiled her ever pleasant smile to the young girl.

"Okay", Yachiru pouted.

So, Unohana and Yachiru pulled the man down and Unohana cleared his wounds and then left him a bill.

"That was fun", Unohana giggled.

"Yeah, it was", Yachiru giggled as well.

"Let's keep this between us", Unohana smiled.

"Okay", Yachiru said placing a finger over her lips.

Unohana grabbed the young girl's hand and Yachiru squeezed back.

"I love hanging out with", she said to the healer.

"And I love hanging out with you too", the healer replied to the fukutaicho.

**The end**

**Sorry so short and if the ending suck but I would really like to know what you thought of this fanfic. Please review.**


	3. Chapter 3

**This fanfic is about how Yachiru is on her period and has to deal with a cocky new recruit who obviously does not know how to deal with girls. Especially girls who are PMSing.**

Yachiru was in no mood to deal with the new recruits today. But Ken-chan said it would help relieve her stress. And boy did she need a stress reliever.

She had cramps from the waist down and everything hurt, including her hair. She had a migraine the size of Sajin-taicho with the pressure of Yamamoto-soutaicho. Not to mention it was hot out and she hated the heat.

She walked onto the training grounds to see ten new faces and not one, a female.

_This is going to be a long and stressful day_ she thought sighing.

"Alright you maggots, assemble", she shouted.

Everyone assembled and saluted as Yachiru went down the line. All but one, who just stood there looking pissed to be here.

"You", she pointed to the arrogant boy. "What's your problem?"

"I'm sorry, but our lieutenant is a midget who's candy obsessed and I'm supposed to respect you?" he smirked.

"I am not candy obsessed, I'm just candy passionate. And my love of candy has nothing to do with how I run this squad. Now drop and give me fifty!" she shouted.

"Someone's a bit touchy today", he smirked again leaning downward to start his pushups.

"A hundred!" she shouted again.

"Fine, fine. Don't get your panties in a twist", he sneered at her.

"Keep doing pushups until I say stop", she called over her shoulder as she went to go address the other new recruits.

After several drills and several snide remarks from a certain new recruit who she learned his name was Yoshiro Kuno, she finally called it a day and released them to go home.

_Finally, I can get some sl—_ but her thoughts were interrupted when she felt a hand tap her shoulder and the voice of a cocky jackass ask her "So, I am going to being pushups everyday or will I be actually doing some training anytime soon?"

Yachiru had had enough. She drew out her zanpakuto and yelled, "You want training, I'll give you training!"

She lunged forward and aim for his torso. He leaned backwards, nearly reaching the ground, as he dodged her assault.

She stood there in shock and fury as he dodged her attack.

He leaped away from her and unsheathed his zanpakuto. "Come out me if you think you can", he dared her cocking his eyebrow to the side.

"Fine", she huffed leaping to the sky and plowing down on top of him.

She thought she had landed an attack only to find out that he shielded her attack with his own zanpakuto.

"Not bad, for a _girl_ " he drawled laughing.

That did it. Yachiru had really had enough now. So she dropped her down her zanpakuto, drew her arm back and punched him square in the face.

"How was that, for a girl?" she smirked as he fell backwards clenching his now bleeding nose.

"Great", he joked.

"Good", she smiled. "Now that you're done training for the day, you have time to paint my room".

"Why the hell would I do that?" he griped.

"Because if you don't, I'll tell Ken-chan what you did today", she smirked.

"Who the heck is Ken-chan?" he said trying to stand up.

"Oh, I guess you don't know who that is. Ken-chan is really Zaraki-taicho. Captain of the eleventh division of the thirteen Gotei", she smiled happily.

"Oh my—"

"So you better do as I say or else" she said folding her arms around her chest.

Yoshiro sighed, realizing defeat and followed Yachiru to her quarters.

When he got there he saw candy and clothes everywhere and toys out the wazu.

"I have to clean this?" he said his mouth agaped.

"Yes", she said. "While wearing this".

She handed him a pink tutu and a pink tiara she got from the human world.

"You've got to be kidding me?" he asked.

"Nope", she smirked as he took the tutu and went to go change.

"Aww! You look so adorable!" she squealed.

"Great", he grunted and began to clean her room.

The next day he came to the training ground, saluted when she approached and addressed her properly.

"Good, you've learned", she smiled at him. "But that still didn't mean I wouldn't embarrass you", she smirked pointing behind.

When he turned around he saw a big poster of him in the tutu and the tiara holding up her stuffed animals.

"Don't ever mess with me again or I'll do something much worse" she said to him then turned and walked.

_That ought to show him_ she giggled to herself.


End file.
